This is a sad goodbye. Before I drop one of many balls in the air, I have to make a decision.
I’m in the middle of self –publishing a collection of my earlier blogs for family and friends who don’t have a computer or don’t read blogs… a little Christmas stocking filler….
Self-publishing is quite time- consuming, especially when you live an hour away from the printer, and want to discuss spacing, type-faces, size of headings, capitals, design the page lay-out, whether to up or change the italics, design the cover, edit and proof read and lots of other details .
I do my own editing and proof-reading since it’s been part of my work experience (my proudest boast is that knowing nothing of rugby, I edited a gold plated edition of the World Book of Rugby, and picked up when the rugby writer himself had muddled James Small with Jason Little!). Editing takes time – tightening up sentence construction, and grammar, weeding out unnecessary words, especially adverbs, making sure all the verbs are active and not passive apart from the obvious spelling and punctuation. And then the proof-reading.
I’ve been doing this, as well as spending one day a week with clients who come for counselling, and am also in the midst of writing another book, and have to revise the completed manuscript of another book. I also write articles for a parenting magazine, and do proof reading. And I’m selling my recent book ‘The Sound of Water’ – packing it up to send to libraries and to post to people. I didn’t put it into bookshops, as they take most of the profit on a book. But by doing radio interviews, local newspaper interviews and talking to groups – I’m speaking at another book club next week – the book sells.
I’ve managed to juggle these balls with the time spent on blogging, which as we all know isn’t just writing a blog, but is also a very time-consuming activity!
The ball that I can’t drop, is my 83 year old husband, whose health has taken a dive, and we are into a round of regular hospital visits and side-trips to doctor, x-ray departments, and all the paraphernalia of modern medicine. (As an alternative treatment addict myself, this is all anathema to me.) And I also have family and friends who need me at different levels of engagement.
So I’ve decided that blogging, which has been an amazing distraction from everyday problems, and an enjoyment of unsuspected depths, is the thing that for now has to go on the back burner. The thing that really twists my heart is saying good-bye to the wonderful, loving friends I’ve made.
Reading people’s blogs means that you also read their soul, for blogging is not just creative but a very deep emotional engagement with bloggers who are living lives of challenge and emotional depths. Bloggers share their self doubts, their pain, their heart-aches, and their interests, their joys, their spiritual search. And it’s been very precious to experience that depth of tenderness and vulnerability from the beautiful men who blog. With women we are not surprised to experience their emotional open-ness, but to have that same experience with men, feels very rare and beautiful.
The people – men and women – I’m talking about, will all know who they are, and they are beloved.
I shall miss the animals too, Fuzzy and Boomer, Zoey the Cool cat, fat piggie Charlotte and Ton-ton in his smart blue coat, Sunni’s mischievous little darlings, and Sharla’s kitty-kats who enjoy sitting on the dashboard on long journeys and watching the road ahead. Buckminster and Amber, what will I do without you? How will you manage in Sweden? I shall still follow silently the stories of your lives and quietly click the ‘likes’. But for now, I have to cope with my life.
I’ve learned and discovered so much from reading other’s blogs… blogging has been an education for me. And thank you, wonderful friends who’ve encouraged me, given me the confidence to become more direct and honest in my own writing, and showed me that we can all be accepted for who we are, and not for what we do. It’s been such a privilege to enter this world, and to be accepted, and to make such deep and loving connections. I can’t bear to say goodbye to you, so will continue to read you and to love you.
P.S. If you’re interested in my next book, it’s called ‘Chasing The Dragon – an addiction to life.’ It’s 195 pages.
The ebook version is out now and it will be available free for a limited time on:
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/254812
and on some platforms Smashwords distributes to (Apple, Barnes and Noble, etc);
and on Amazon Kindle here: http://www.amazon.com/Chasing-Dragon-addiction-living-ebook/dp/B00A99RERO/ref=sr_1_3?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1353492963&sr=1-3&keywords=chasing+the+dragon
for 99 cents (that is currently their minimum price).
It will also be available as a paperback on Amazon for US$12. 99 plus postage.
To order the printed in New Zealand book (with flaps and deckle edges, printed on Munken Cream paper) which is available now at NZ $30, US $24, and 15 UK pounds, contact Valerie Davies at:
Or Merlincourt Press,
P.O. Box 161
Leigh 0947, Rodney
New Zealand
valeriedavies 
The number of comments on your farewell post is testament to the value you have added to all our lives. Go well Cyber Friend.
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Tersia, thank you. I feel quite overwhelmed with with all the loving support from everyone, including you. I hope everything works out for the highest good of everyone in your life, Valerie
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I’ll miss you. You write beautifully and clearly live the same way. I wish you the best. Pat
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Pat, thank you so much for your kind words – so appreciative- I really value them. Good to hear from you, and I hope all goes well with your plans and writing, Valerie
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Thank you so much Bobbie, for your comments and good wishes. Your message came as the answer to my prayers, as I’d been unable to sleep all night, worrying about my latest crisis, and wondering what the next step in my writing life would be.
I would love the name of your friend with the publishing company . The synchronicity of your message is just amazing. Thank you so much.
If you were able to reply to merlincourtpress@gmail.com that would get to me. Warm wishes, Valerie
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Valerie, I applaud your decision, but look forward to your return. Also, should you ever need it, let me know as I have a good friend through my writing site who is co-owner of a publishing company in New Zealand. ~ Much love and a wish for your peace (and the health of your husband) ~ Love, Bobbie
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Thank you so much Bobbie, for your comments and good wishes. Your message came as the answer to my prayers, as I’d been unable to sleep all night, worrying about my latest crisis, and wondering what the next step in my writing life would be.
I would love the name of your friend with the publishing company . The synchronicity of your message is just amazing. Thank you so much.
If you were able to reply to merlincourtpress@gmail.com that would get to me. Warm wishes, Valerie
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I will miss your lively stories and recipes. You have an amazing passion for life and I hope that your husband’s health issues work out. Good luck in your endeavors!
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Kate, lovely to hear from you, and thank you so much for your good wishes… I remembered your words about blogging not being for sissies as I came to my decision, But felt I had no choice but to join their ranks!!!!
Well done you, blogging on so successfully !
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Life is just so defined by priorities and your priority in this case is obvious–I hope this proves to be a temporary good-bye, as I was just enjoying beginning to get to know you. You’ve obviously created a lovely and large blog community and have a lot to share.
Best wishes.
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That was a lovely comment from you, and very much appreciated… yes, the blogging community is amazing, isn’t it, and such a wrench to leav, warm wishes, valerie….
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You will be greatly missed…your lovely words and kind soul have a presence and I will await your return! Wishing you all the best with your new book. Prayers for your husband’s health. Wishing you many blessings!
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Thank you so much for finding the time to comment, and wish me well. I really appreciate your kindness and lovely words, warm wishes, Valerie
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I’ll miss you too. Hope you come back to blogging and in the meantime I’ve made a note to check out your ebook.
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Oh, thank you, for your message – how lovely that you’re interested in the e-book… Kindle are being difficult at the moment, not sure why – but it should be available in a few day, Hope all your projects are flourishing, best wishes, Valerie.
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May this decision be a blessing to you and your husband…best of luck to you!
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Thank you so much Gretchen, for your kind message – very much appreciated, best wishes to you, Valerie
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Valerie, I feel a real loss at hearing this but completely understand your choice and its wisdom. May your husband’s health improve and become more manageble. May you continue to publish and I will be buying your book as I loved ‘the Sound of Water’ and would recommend it to anyone…in fact, when I finished reading it, I felt a sadness, like a friendship had ended, it was that engaging. I will get around to writing a review on Kindle when spare time shows up in my life. May everything else in life balance out for you as you sound so terribly busy. God bless Valerie, I will miss you but I know I can pick up your book and be with you all over again. Lots of love my friend, Leanne xx
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Dear Leanne,
Thank you for your lovely, loving message.. It’s the contact with friends like you that I regret the most, but comfort myself that it may not be forever!
Life is very challenging in all sorts of ways at the moment, and it’s been some relief that blogging is one less thing to keep up with!
Thank you for what you say about the book, it’s such a real joy to know that one’s labour of love is enjoyed by others like you, and I really value your appreciation.
I shall keep an eye on you and your doings in your lovely and valuable blog,
much love, Valerie
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I repeat that I am very sad and I’ll miss you. Go well my dear friend.
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I’m a little late to the gathering here, Valerie, but kudos on having the right priorities. I wish you luck with your creative and family tasks, and hope I’ll still see you sometimes at The Artist’s Road. And you can always return to this when you’re ready. It’s clear a lot of people would like that!
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Thank you for your message Patrick, good to hear from you. Yes, I will be quietly keeping up with your lovely blog..and it was really heartening to have your encouragement, thank you and best wishes, Valerie
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Thank you for all you have blogged, Valerie! Best wishes for you and your husband!
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Thank you – I’m keeping up with your blogs!
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I read your books with much pleasure, I’m sure !
I’m glad I met you ! Best wishes !
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How lovely that you left a message. Thank you so much, I really appreciate your friendly comments, very best wishes to you too
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Dear, Dear Valerie
I shall miss you. We’ve been so busy recently that I’ve been a bit out of touch with everyone and today have been trying to catch up and reply…. I suddenly realised that I hadn’t heard from you for a while so came along to make sure you were okay and found this heart wrenching goodbye. I so agree with all you have said about the blogging world and the lovely people we have met through this medium.
I so hope your dear husband is okay and that you get through this trying time with equanimity and a good outcome.
I wish you every success with your writing, hope you will pop in from time to time to catch up with some beautiful things and hope all is well.
I have so enjoyed your blogging and am so pleased I had the privilege of meeting you and becoming one of your blogging friends. Like many others, if you do ever manage to write here again, I’ll be back too
All the very best
Sally
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Sally, what a lovely message from you, stepping back from friends like you was the hardest part, but I still read your beautiful blog, and I’ll still leave a smile there.
Life is a bit trying at the moment, and the road seems to have many hidden bends , but we keep stepping along the way…
Do you know that catchy Sidney Carter Hymn… I’ll be travelling along with you”…
I wish we had been nearer, I think we could have had such fun having a long conversation about so many beautiful things,
With love, Valerie
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Hi Valerie,
Though very probably in 1912 you will not blog anymore, I think I should give you a “farewell gift”.
I have nominated you for the Blog of the Year 2012 award, because of all what you have done so far.
See for that award
All my best wishes for you and your family!
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Hope you had a great Thanksgiving and are in the midst of a great Thanksgiving weekend!
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Oh no – for so many reasons, Valerie! I’m sorry about your beloved. That must be very stressful and I am so sorry. I will miss you terribly and can only maintain any semblance of acceptance by saying…See You When You Come Back! Much love to you, you gifted woman!
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I’m keeping on keeping on reading my favourite blogs, so you’ll see a smiling face sometimes!!!!
I don’t want to say goodbye to my special friends… much love Amy
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It is sad that you are leaving.. I have been a frequent visitor of your blog. You will be missed. I wish you all the very best for your upcoming project.
Hope your husband gets well soon. Take care 🙂
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Thank you so much for commenting and for your good wishes, I really appreciate you taking the time to write, and thank you for visiting my blog in the past, best wishes, valerie
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Perhaps you will pick up the blogging again when the dust settles? In the meantime, I hope you will still stop by from time to time. Bon courage et bon chance!
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Thank you so much for your lovely message and good wishes … yes, I will certainly be dropping in for my taste of French country life!
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I shall miss you too. Even though I have only just discovered you I feel that the connections that we make are sometimes very deep and very quick. Your adieu, which in French means goodbye for now rather than goodbye for ever, has made me think of the one in, one out. I am just beginning blogging as you are finishing, for now.
All good wishes and I look forward to meeting you again soon.
Corinne
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Thank you Corinne – lovely to hear from you. I agree, I think our connections are deep, time is purely subjective.
I hope you enjoy blogging as much as I did – and maybe do!- I’m still doing a lot of reading!
best wishes, Valerie
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Oh wow Valerie, you are one busy lady! And also a wonderful blogger friend. I wish you a happy and bountiful time, whatever you work on. And thank you for so regularly brightening my day
Best Wishes, Claire
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That was meant to read one busy and talented woman !!! ooops 🙂
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Claire, thank you so much for your comments, lovely hear from you… I’m still keeping track of the blogs I love, as you can see, so will be following your lovely evocative blog, warm wishes, Valerie
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I really like your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you design this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you? Plz respond as I’m looking to create my own blog and would like to know where u got this from. thank you
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Thank you for your comments. If you go back through the archives to the very first blog, you will find how to contact the person who created my blog for me – hope this finds you, V
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Somehow I missed this, so today I went looking for you. I will miss you! Blessings on your writing and caretaking. I will watch for new books and tales from your fingertips.
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Alice – how lovely to hear from you – hope all is well in your neck of the woods. Thank you for your good wishes, and for your unfailing support,
warmest wishes, and an early happy Christmas to you+
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Alice – how lovely to hear from you – hope all is well in your neck of the woods. Thank you for your good wishes, and for your unfailing support,
warmest wishes, and an early happy Christmas to you+
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Just calling in to say Hello and to hope that your Dear Husband is doing okay and that you yourself are well too, with love and wishes for a Happy Christmas 🙂
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Valerie, I just wanted to thank you for your beautiful reply to me today, and to say I will look out for you in the New Year 😉
I haven’t yet had a chance to check out your new book, but it’s on my to-do list. My very best to you and yours…
Alarna
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‘Reading people’s blogs means that you also read their soul’ – very perceptive.
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Thank you Rosalie – you and I are reading each other’s stuff at the same time obviously!
I’ve just left a comment on your blog…
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WOW !! You are amazing, Valerie. In the short time that I met and visited you here – I know I am going to miss seeing you. I definitely hope you will be around more often than you might think you might be 😀 Wishing you much love and success for your work and family time ❤
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Hello good friend – thank you so much for your lovely words…and lovely to hear from you
But yes, after a break I’m back, and loving being back among my blogging friends again !!!
A Happy New Year new year to you and yours, Valerie
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An in depth article… I’m astounded! Nearly all articles or blog posts I’ve been browsing are absolute rubbish.
I mean honestly, they aren’t even factually correct. Thankfully, your article is and I bookmarked it for later on!
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Howdy!
It appears as though we both have a interest for the same thing.
Your blog and mine are very similar. Have you ever thought of writing a guest write-up
for a related blog? It will unquestionably help gain exposure
to your blog (my website receives a lot of visitors). If you might be interested,
e-mail me. Thank you
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Thank you for thinking of me… I think I’d really have to know more about your blog before I could have an opinion…
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Valerie–something peculiar happened today on my blog. I replied to a comment in a hurry. Only later I realized it is a new method of spam. Could you delete the comment and its source please? On your older post, A Blogger’s Farewell, someone replied to a comment I made. This morning Oussama (December 28, 2013 at 1:43 pm) made a comment that does not fit the content and has a false gravatar. Could you delete his comment from your post–and my comment as well–and be on the lookout for these spammers. Here is more info. http://bluefishway.com/2013/12/28/warning-troll-in-wordpress-comments/
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I’ll immediately clutch your rss feed as I can not in finding your e-mail subscription link or e-newsletter service.
Do you have any? Kindly let me recognise so that I may subscribe.
Thanks.
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