Laughter and tears are not very far apart was the subject of an essay I once had to write at school. This is somewhat how I feel as I go once more into Spam, to clean out yet another of the daily two or three hundred messages which continue to accumulate ever since I wrote a blog with the headline ‘Ladies and Gentlemen: The Queen’. Sometimes I laugh. Sometimes I feel like crying with boredom as I work my way through hundreds of ‘delete permanently’!
When I first discovered over seven hundred in there, I was puzzled – why this sudden influx? Worse – they were all about Viagra, penis enlargement, electronic cigarettes and teenage sex, but overwhelmingly the first two. I looked to see what stories could have triggered this avalanche of information overload, and each one was hooked to the ‘Ladies and Gentleman…’ story.
Since there were no ads about gay sex, I assumed that it wasn’t the word ‘queen’ in the title which had provoked all the cyber-babble, so it had to be the words ‘ladies and gentlemen’ which activated dormant computers all over the world and continue to do so.
What a sad reflection of where our language and our thoughts have gone… the original meaning of lady being a derivation of loaf-kneader – a definition I love; and where has Chaucer’s ‘verray parfit gentil knight gone?’ The goodness and nobility which was implied by the word gentleman seem to have dissolved along with evolution of a gentleman into someone only interested in his penis, in company with dissolute ‘ladies’ who will cavort alongside these enlarged penises.
The refinement implied by the words ‘ladies and gentlemen’, now seems a very old fashioned concept. If I had written: ‘Women and Men: the Queen’, would it have jerked into action all these persistent purveyors of Viagra, or is it only ladies and gentlemen who are interested in sex?
So thanks to spam, my view of life on earth has been expanded, and I now have an insight into a somewhat raunchy world which I didn’t even know existed, in which I was offered photos of surgery as well as enlargement pills which claim to do the same thing as the knife. I’ve pondered this problem of my bulging spam box, and have decided that the best way to stop the deluge, is to go back to the blog, and change the head-line to: “The Queen”. So if you get a post from me, so entitled, just delete it unread… it’ll be my attempt to restore some sort of normality to the spam box. If there was a competition for the most spam – I’d win easily.
That’s the low of blogging – whether it’s hilarious or tragic is hard to say… the high is The Conversation and connection. At the end of my tenth month of blogging, I’ve decided that that’s the indispensable ingredient of blogging. As time goes by, each blogger seems to attract like minds, so that we are lots of little shoals of fish swimming and connecting in the great internet ocean.
We know that there are some whales around with thousands and even millions of followers, but for the most part we are happy to swim around our own little back water, enjoying the company of all the other multi-coloured little fish around us. Sometimes one of the little fish becomes a big fish over-night when they receive the accolade of being Word-Pressed. Then there are lots of excited eddies around the favoured one, and then life goes back to normal and the ripples fade away.
As the months have gone by some treasured friends have disappeared, and one usually gets a sense of the unspoken why … ill health, family problems, finding blogging too onerous, feeling disappointed at not attracting a readership… there have been blogs that I’ve conscientiously liked and commented on, seeing that the writer may be feeling a bit lonely, but one person cannot make a blog popular… so I’ve seen some of these blogs quietly disappear, and I’ve felt sad.
At the same time, wonderful, new, brightly coloured bloggers swim into sight, and suddenly the pool feels livelier for their presence. And the fish we’ve been swimming with for a while… we come to know them. They may not say they’re going through divorce or grave illness or financial ruin – and sometimes they do – but they share their grief and broken-heartedness, and somehow we are richer for being in contact with each other as life swirls and swoops and takes a dive or hits a high. Sometimes they swim off and disappear while they rest or heal, but when they return, they get a great welcome. Cyber friendships make a golden spider’s web of light and connection around the globe.
When I see those amazing pictures of the planet from space, with all the lights on around the landmasses, I now also see that invisible web of golden threads linking hearts and minds across the world – the bloggers of the world – united by friendship, fun and common interests.
The common interest of most bloggers seems to be the well being of our world. Most bloggers care a lot about the planet. They are aware that unless we do something fast, our children and our grandchildren will not inherit the easy unthinking lives of abundance of water, food, forests, fish and all the other things we take for granted.
Thanks to another blogger Ana-Ela at www.spiritualanalog.com I watched the wonderful video below. In it Edgar Mitchell says: “The root of the environmental and social crises facing humanity is the misperception that we are separate – from each other, the planet, and the cosmos as a whole”. And this is one of the blessings of blogging… it is showing us that we are not separate, but rather, how connected we all are. And that’s the real high.
http://www.planetarycollective.com/overview/
Food for Threadbare Gourmets
I love leftovers. We had some turkey left over from our little dinner with friends, so the next day I did what some would call fricassee of turkey. (I learned the other day that fricassee of chicken was Abraham Lincoln’s favourite dish) I put on some long grain rice to cook, and in another saucepan some wild rice, so that the black grassy spikes would make the white rice look and taste more interesting. (It takes longer to cook than ordinary rice, so needs to be cooked separately)
I made a white sauce, and popped the chopped up turkey into it, plus the remains of the mushroom garlic and cream sauce, and the dregs of the gravy from the night before. Then while the rice was finishing, I fried some chopped onion and celery, added some frozen peas to melt, and when the rice was drained, forked in the fried mixture. It was truly tasty with the turkey on top, and some fresh green beans given to us by another neighbour.
Food for Thought
The Two Bridges
I came to the void that encircles heaven, and found two bridges there.
And while I worried over which to attempt, a voice leapt the dark:
One is for open minds and one for open hearts. Either will get you across.
From Journeys on the Razor-edged Path by Simons Roof
valeriedavies 
This one made me come here to comment, though I’m enerally painfully shy. I loved the fish analogy. I’m swimming past you now sporting a bright, if neglected, dorsal fin. Happy to join you in the internet ocean and hoping I’m not dismissed as spam. 🙂
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Patrick, thank you for screwing up your courage to comment ! Good to hear from you… hope you don’t go on swimming past, but stick around in our little shoal for a while…
I also love your fat
contented, pussy cat…..warm wishes
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My morning is complete now that I read your post. I started blogging for a couple of reasons, one to respond my father’s last request to start writing, something that was very different from my career path. Another reason was to understand the relevancy of social media in our world. Just as in any in-person conversation there are the same social behaviors of givers and takers, talkers and non talkers, listeners and non listeners. But there have many surprises for me – my knowledge acquisition has been extraordinary. Sharing across a global world, I am more in tune with the diverse pulses that move in waves across the Internet. There are many stories – and they are all uniquely beautiful, profound and moving. They have caused a shift in my thinking and created a host of new possibilities. May we continue to seek the very best in each other…
I thank you again for creating an amazing space that inspires life affirming dialogues….
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Dear Rebecca,
I didn’t answer your beautiful comment straight away, as you gave me so much to think about. You comments are always so perceptive and full of insights which I love.
What you say about the things we learn and the connection with all the waves that pulse across the Internet is so true, and so beautifully put.
It’s amazing the way we share and shift our points of view in all the contacts we make around the world. I’d miss it terribly if it stopped now! And thank you so much for your words , and the way you see my blog, it’s very inspiring for me.
PS now I know it’s morning when you see my posts I know why wherever I go on the internet to other blogs – your smiling face is already there!
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Valerie! Do youuse akismet to capture spam? Oh deary me. Thank goodness it comes free with the .com wordpress site.
I do relate very strongly with this post. I am posting less these days due to. Time constraints and because my journeyofthegypsy blog gets the same amount of traffic as my main one. Having put so much time and effort into my posts only to discover that tattoos are the rage is disheartening! No fear though. I shall recover. 🙂
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Thank you Lesley – yes, believe it or not I do use Akismet… they tell me they’re protected me from 9,987 so far, but at this moment there are another 228 messages to be cleared from spam since yesterday!
Yes I had noticed that your lovely posts were fewer – but they are always beautiful… actually, when there are fewer, somehow there’s more time to concentrate on them, than if you know another is going to come in the next day…
Do not be down-hearted about the tattoos – I actually thought they were going out of fashion…XXXX.
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It will be interesting to see what the new title does. Perhaps you will have to lead in with: Her Majesty…The Queen. Sex sells and you hit on it. Sorry it ended up in your lap. Love the fish analogy and am glad I’m one of them swimming around your posts. Now to view the video.
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Hello Lynne, love your comments … you’re right about sex sells- another blogger has told me she did a cookery post on ‘naked ravioli’ which got the treatment!!!
Hope you enjoy the video as much as I did… I felt ‘high’ for days after I first saw it,, and am going to watch it again quite often I’ve decided.
Yes, I’m glad we swim around in the same little shoal !!!
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There are a few I responses from this post that I could express. Humorous sympathy for the spam problem, consolation for the degradation of our society, appreciation for that lovely “Food for Thought.”
Really, though, my strongest reaction was adoration of your analogies. I was just writing a post and wondering at how matter-of-fact, anti-creative my writing style is, only to stumble across two beautiful metaphors. Kudos, my friend.
p.s. I’m brainstorming a post about anachronism, and would like to reference your paragraph on the altered definitions of “Ladies” and “Gentleman,” if you’ll allow me to reblog a portion?
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Thank you so much for your encouraging comments – so glad you enjoyed the post.
Yes, of course you can use the para – but would love you to post your blog to me … can’t see how to get to it from your gravatar
Would be very interested to read your ‘brain storming’, warm wishes
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I assure you that, as a chronic planner, anachronism is currently in its earliest brainstorm stages; looking like a light drizzle at the moment, and the thunder is miles off. Though my big reason for carrying a blog is to force myself into whimsical activities on just that: whims…Perhaps I’ll try at hastening the process!
I wonder why my name doesn’t link correctly…my blog is at http://insidetheflames.wordpress.com/. Thanks for the interest and permission!
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Thank you!!!
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“Cyber friendships make a golden spider’s web of light and connection around the globe.”, Lovely phrase, especially since it reflect a reality indeed and din fact. I feel thankful for the people I met, and their likes and work, people from all around the world.
Thank you for your ever so encouraging comments Valerie…You brought your homeland at my arm length, and closer.
Have a great day!
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Thank you George for your lovely comment, I’m so glad it feels like that for you too… it is so good to be in touch, warm wishes, valerie
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Dear Valerie,
You are the master.
Good luck with the title change tactic.
The sub-sea part of me (all!) loved the fish analogy and the male part of me (all!) cringed at the rest.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug
Always a treat to have your wonderful comments…thank you, even though I don’t deserve such an accolade!
Please don’t cringe – we’re all in this together, the ladies as well as the gents! I would never have wanted to make anyone feel uncomfortable, especially the real men/ true gentlemen – like you….
with warmest regards, Valerie
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Another great post! Yes, we do take a lot for granted. Let’s hope the planet survives. Go green! 🙂
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Thank you so much, Terry, glad you enjoyed it
I think the planet will survive in spite of us, but am not so sure about the human race in the long run! Anyway, greeting from another greenie!!!
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Now this is odd, as i also have suddenly been deluged in spam, nothing quite as exciting as yours though! But I wonder if anyone else is suffering from this as well.. c
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Do you think it was the mention of morning sickness in your headline Celi??????You never know what turns people on !!!
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So far my spam box is not over-loaded…I shall stay away from potential topics now that I know they can draw forth the unwanted. Who knows, maybe starting irrigation water is just not so interesting as royalty. 🙂
Anyway, enjoyed your post once more!
Sending you rain and more rain as we move into spring and you move into fall!
Linda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
http://deltacountyhistoricalsociety.wordpress.com
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Hello LInda – it’s magic! Since I changed the title and took out the words ( you know what!) the spam has dropped down to a copeable drizzle of eleven!
Not sure why any of it gets through if Akismet works as it should, but que sera sera!!!
Glad you enjoyed the post, friend… is your water picking up yet?
We have a few light showers forecast for after Easter, and then nothing… it’s usually warm and dry at this time of the year, but we’ve usually had plenty of rain to carry us through… not so this year… I shall be buying water for the tank again next week, so we don’t run out…again, que sera sera!!!
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I’m still wiping the tears of laughter from my eyes, Valerie! My posts don’t get that kind of SPAM-tention, something to be grateful for…xoxoM
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So glad you enjoyed a laugh, Margarita, I love to know that someone’s laughing!… if you’re envious just put a word like hairy or naked in a headline, and I’m told that brings ’em in in shoals!!!!
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I don’t know, Valerie. I was warned that my “baby bump” in the title of a recent post might bring the perverts out in droves. So far: NADA! I think you’ve got a magic touch!!! xoxoM
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I suppose they think it’s too late, and are leaving the field to talc and nappy /diaper ads !!!
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Another wonderfully entertaining and thought-provoking article, dear Valerie. I do love your special insights into everyday life. I do believe that we are all interconnected within the Web of Life, tiny threads linked to each other, waves in the ocean of pulsating energy. This becomes especially obvious in the blogging world. I do so love your analogy of the fish! Bless you.
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Dear LizzieJoy, what a lovely message from you, so glad you not only enjoyed the blog but understood so deeply what I was trying to say. It is lovely to be connected to you dear friend. XXX
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A wonderful post, and so is the reply of Clanmother.
Can I double-like or extra-like this post? 🙂
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Thank you Paula, how lovely to hear from you. Yes, wasn’t Clanmother’s reply wonderful… and that’s the thing about blogging, every post is expanded by the perceptive comments of other bloggers.. So glad you enjoyed the post…
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The network you describe, is a global substitute for what we ones had as a tight network within our local communities. Such a global network learns us to think internationally, multi-culturally and multi religiously. That is a very good thing. But you are right, all are there again: the good, bad, and the ugly (spam). In that sense, it is the same as it was before.
You and Clanmother are talented to put lots of thoughts and feelings in short pieces. Keep going.
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Dear Paula, Thank you for your second thoughts on the post – very true – and I do think the fact that it is global – making us feel that our world is a village – is a step towards the oneness that in the end will bring love and peace to the planet. Thank you so much for your encouragement, it is lovely to feel that you appreciate our writings.
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Fricassee! I didn’t know it was called that. But that’s what my family always did with the leftovers from a roast chicken dinner. Your observations on blogging and bloggers are so astute and so enjoyable to read. Spammers..argh. I haven’t been plagued as yet but I realised with horror the other day that the word gallivant is not entirely as sweet a word as I supposed. Fortunately spammers have limited vocabularies so I have been spared having to change my name..so far. I like that lady is derived from loaf-kneader. I also like that laundry is derived from lavender, but, even there, one must be careful as lavenderwomen could also mean a loaf-kneader who belonged to that ladies and gentlemen group beloved of spammers. Oh it is tricky.
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Good to hear from you… I like the word gallivant – is it your surname?… how interesting that laundry is derived from lavender… makes it feel quite different…you may be interested to know that the avalanche of spam has disappeared since I changed the title on the blog! So you’re obviously right about spammers limited vocabularies !!!
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No ‘to gallivant’ is simply an expression that my sister and I use to describe our activities outside the home. Our joke is not that we gallivant but that we “gaily vant” which makes very little sense but comes from the silly word games we play across the miles.
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sounds great – I enjoy gallivanting anyway !!!
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You’ve made me realise I never look in my spam folder at all, it doesn’t register in my consciousness when I view the InBox, I trust that whatever google puts in there is something I don’t need to see and that is confirmed by taking a quick peek now, surprised to see there are 260 messages. An entire corrupt economy of messages saying you’ve won something or some other dishonest claim, I click away, not wanting it to taint my day any further and really do feel thankful that someone somewhere is filtering out these messages.
I like the quote about how we are all connected and to the planet, it is so true. It pains me that we are drilling into the earth and the seabed as if it were inanimate and disconnected to life around it, I was shocked seeing the latest invention to scrape the seabed and use rocks and minerals for their copper deposits etc, the planet and it’s ecosystem helpless to protest against this brutality.
Bloggers, yes, one of the shining lights of the universe. 🙂
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Hello Claire… we all seem to have some spam that has blighted our life – or not! I hadn’t heard about the latest invention to scrape the seabed… it’s hard not to get depressed at the evil projects that scientific minds devise to make more money … Bloggers of the world unite! There are supposed to be some billions of us, aren’t there!
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I’m always try to be careful with my words when blogging. For good, or ill, they hold such power and their abuse by others is one of those things that really bothers me. … I hope you get the spam sorted. … And I agree, the connection we feel as like-minded bloggers is something special. It underscores the fact we aren’t alone. … Great post! .. Be well, Dorothy 🙂
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Hello Dorothy, Good to hear from you… yes… sometimes the pen is mightier than the sword, though I’m not so sure about drones! And sometimes people see things in our words which was quite different to what we intended…. Spam sorted… amazing, from the moment I changed the title, it all stopped!
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Well said!
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Thank you Bruce… give Bucks and Amber a scratch behind the ears for me…
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Love the fish analogy, as do so many of your faithful. Today, well today I believe I will be one of those wonderful Japanese Fighting Fish (I can’t seem to remember their name). I love the way they look, so graceful and at peace alone in their bowls.
You know I believe you are right, many of us though we may come after things from different perspectives have similar goals and cares. Many of us seek the connectiveness (I think this isn’t really a word) to create community and working groups of care, for the earth, for so many things upon it.
As to your spam, well we all get this. I have a couple of titles that continue to attract unwanted attention. I scan lists to make certain no one valid is on it, then mass delete them. I try to do it at least three times a week so it doesn’t take by a couple of minutes now, no hundreds trying to bother me.
Loved your quote!
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I thought there had to be a way to delete en masse, as my wrist got tired doing ‘delete permanently’ for hundreds! Japanese fighting fish…. d’you mean carp… think your name is much better!!!
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You should see a little box at the very top of your screen you can click which will check every one of the spam entries on the screen. Once clicked, you should then be able to simply select “Delete Permanently”.
Are they Carp? I don’t know, they ones I am thinking of come in brilliant colors and you can buy them at pet stores singly.
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I agree with Doug, You are a master, Valerie!
“…but rather, how connected we all are. And that’s the real high.” Yes, I can feel the real high, especial when I’m connected with the wisdom and insights, like right now 🙂 Thank you!
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Dear Amy, you are such a loyal and appreciative reader… I’m so lucky to be in the same little coloured fish shoal as you ! Thank you for your words, and for your insights too… this is the thing about blogging, we learn so much from each other….
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Here is an odd one — I blogged about airplane travel and used a clipart of a plane. The clipart is hit on every single day and so is the post. I couldn’t figure out why this old post kept getting high hits but it was the search engines locating airplane clipart. Go figure. I feel the same way you do about my blogging buddies. I get sad when I lose one but from no where a wonderful writer pops into my blogosphere and makes it all better!
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The ways of the internet are inscrutable!!!! yes, the blogophere is a constantly shifting kalaidoscope… one could never get bored!
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Once again… well said 🙂
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Thank you !
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There was a time, Viagra, when spam was an unknown meat in a tin. No change nowadays on the internet then 😉 Ralph xox
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You’re right Ralph, but even in a tin Spam was repellent, and only fit for those with no taste!!! Verdigris XXX
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Valerie, what an interesting post. I’ve been getting spam on certain posts, but haven’t detected why. I just tracked you down from a comment you made on Celi’s blog, and wondered if you were the NZ Valerie Davies – and you are. So it’s nice to drop in and enjoy your writing.
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Hello Juliet – so good to hear from you… the last time I saw you was at Gurumayi, or Jean Houston????
I’ve visited your blog, but am a very unhandy computer ignoramus, and can’t work my way through the steps to leave a comment. Thank heavens I can cope with WordPress!
Wanted to say how much I loved St Mathews labyrinth and also the shells and the fairies and the cat on the beach… made me long for my grandchildren to be little again, instead of six foot three!!!
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Valerie, you can leave a comment by clicking ‘anonymous’ when it asks for your profile (anon will come up in the drop-down menu when you click to leave a comment). Then you just leave your name at the end of the comment. Do try again; I’d love to know that you are visiting.
I’ve come hunting and am glad I’ve found your reply to my comment here.
Love your blog; so thoughtful and varied.
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Hello Juliet, Thank you for your instructions – will have a go! So glad you enjoy the blog… blogging is so satisfying isn’t it… after years of newspaper writing, to have such an immediate and enthusiastic response is like heaven !!!!
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Great post!! Thank you! I nominated you for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award 2013 – I hope you accept!! http://tersiaburger.com/2013/04/01/very-inspiring-blogger-award-2013/
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What an incredible post – so sorry it took me so long to make it over here! I followed you but didn’t realize until I came looking this morning that the auto-settings were such that I never received notices of your posts…that is now remedied!
The spam is a grand world of fun, isn’t it? I realized after a few months that no matter what I put in my articles, the title of my blog can (and is) misread or misunderstood and the sex-spammers really seem to ‘love’ it…I get upwards of 200 a day even on days I don’t post. What akismet means by having protected you from spam is that it sorts those comments and drops them in the spam folder instead of allowing them to just show up on your threads like normal conversational comments. Imagine having the interruption of hundreds of spam comments on articles like this??
The connections made among so many people from so many places is amazing, isn’t it? My world and views of the world have expanded 1,000 times over just from reading other blogs here…so much to learn, to understand and connect with. I hope our little schools can continue swimming towards one another so that no matter what insanity our governments perform in our names, we can all work past it and build ties as a strong global community that can heal the damage being done both to our nations and to Mama Earth herself.
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Apologies for not replying before… I lost your e-mail, and I so enjoyed it.
I loved your take on blogging, and like you have learned so much, and feel so hopeful about our wonderful blogging community.
As you can tell, I love your blog…
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Beautifully woven threads here, Valerie. I’ve obviously not been writing on the right topics, because my spam folder has been rather empty! Happy to be a little fish in your shoal 😉
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Hello Alarna,
Thank you, glad you enjoyed it.. you can always rectify your meagre spam count by popping some suggestive words in your headlines, you know! I think you’re quite a big fish actually, but it’s great we can all swim together !!!
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Valerie this was just delightful, the second half that is.The spam issue is a sad one. Who are these people behind this stuff I often wonder. What could they possibly be thinking? In the meantime I just delete delete delete.
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Reblogged this on Kevs' Blog.
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Thank you so much… It’s always a thrill to know there’s another connection made, and a new blog to explore – warm wishes, Valerie
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Wow, marvelous blog structure! How lengthy have you been running a blog for?
you made running a blog glance easy. The overall look of your website is wonderful, let alone
the content material!
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